I feel like lately, everything I’ve posted has been about how I don’t want to do anything. This isn’t strictly true, but I feel like maybe I’m being a bit of a negative nelly. In truth, the reason I’m not really doing anything, or at least anything new, is that I’m pretty content with everything just as it is at the moment.
With 2019 now well and truly upon us, everyone is making resolutions. Pretty standard for a new year so nothing exciting there. Everyone wants to get healthier and take better photos and work harder and travel further – normally these are all the things that would make my list. They’re still very much on my list in my head – think of them as an unofficial, accidental, ‘if they happen, they happen’ list.
Realistically, though, setting these kind of wishy-washy goals aren’t going to cut it for me. Neither are stringent, ‘I must reach this many instagram followers or else’ goals. They’re great to aim for, but who can be bothered beating themselves up at the end when they haven’t happened? I can’t. I’d rather spend an extra hour in bed than shouting at myself about how I chose some cake over a salad that one time six months ago. It’s boring and stupid and I’ve done enough of that over the past few years to last me a whole lifetime.
So I’ve come to a bit of a conclusion about the kind of goals I want to set for 2019. Nothing specific, nothing important or definitive or anything like that. All those things happened in 2018 – passing my MA, getting a job, etc. – so I don’t really need anything brand new at the moment. I’m content in 2019 having the potential to be the first year in a while where I don’t have to do anything life changing (not that I won’t, if the moment presents itself).
On to my actual goals for 2019:
I just want to keep moving forward, keep progressing, keep checking myself and bettering myself, and keep being content with the way I’m living.
That doesn’t mean being stagnant, or never changing anything ever. If something needs to change, if something makes me unhappy, or if I check myself and realise I’m causing harm, then so be it. Adapt and move forward. Personal growth and development whenever I can. That’s the very least that we can all do, really.
So that means maybe I’ll stop eating meat again, or maybe I’ll stop spending money where I don’t need to. Maybe I’ll say goodbye to some friendships and hello to some others. Who knows.
Sometimes I think Kyle was really onto something when she chatted shit about ‘realising things’ that time.
I’m not setting goals for 2019 because I’m pretty sure that they’ll set themselves as the year goes on. I’m more than okay with that. Roll on 2019. x