Here’s To Being Selfish

Here's To Being Selfish

[dropcap]P[/dropcap]rioritising can be a pain in the arse. An absolute pain in the arse. Things just get on top of each other and before you know it you’ve burnt out, doing something for someone else when you should really be focusing on yourself, and everything is a mess. I feel ya. With blogs and school and work and socialising and family and everything else, it can all get a little much. That’s okay.

Putting yourself first is okay. You’re allowed to do it. It’s fine. In fact, I’d go so far as to say it’s great. It’s the best thing you can do for yourself and the people around you.

This year is going to be tough for me. With all this final year of uni stuff, and thinking about what to do next stuff, and literally everything on top of it stuff, it’s pretty hard to think straight. Things pile up and other things suffer because of it, and the circle continues until you snap.

Being selfish isn’t a bad thing. Being selfish doesn’t necessarily mean taking all the ice-cream for yourself, or being horrible to someone trying to help. Being selfish can mean things as simple as taking a break and working on yourself. It can mean turning down a few invites or cancelling a few plans, just to allow yourself room to breathe.

This term, in particular, I have a lot to do. I have an essay a week, more or less, as well as my dissertation (a super fun 12,000 words), and numerous job applications, masters applications, etc. I also have a whole host of extra curricular stuff to sort – one of the perks of a collegiate university. Meetings and lectures and events and essays and seminars and volunteering and sports and literally everything to get done at once. Living the dream.

To get it all done, I’m having to be a little selfish. I’m putting myself and my commitments first, and that’s okay. Everyone else is doing it to.

That’s one thing that people don’t realise when they brand selfishness as a terrible thing. Everyone is selfish, and everyone is being selfish. All of my friends are being selfish, working hard on their final years. We’re all being selfish. We’re all putting our studies and our lives first, all thinking that we’re the only ones having to selfishly cancel plans and avoid socialising and whatever. We’re all secretly in the same boat, and that really takes the edge off.

Putting yourself first is important, and it will benefit you in the long run. Looking after your physical health and your mental health, working hard to become the best you can be, cutting out things/people that pull you down, it’s all important. Life’s too short to lose yourself while putting others first.

That’s not to say you shouldn’t make sacrifices. What would the world be if we were all caught up in our own bubbles, ignoring the needs of everyone around us. But you’ll start to notice that with this new found selfishness, or new found drive to do well for yourself, the things you do to help and support others will become so much better. Everything will become easier. People will love the new spring in your step and glow on your face, as you smash life.

Really, being selfish isn’t selfish at all.


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  • Sitara says:

    The only thing I could say after reading this is PREACH! I think you are right when you said there is absolutely nothing wrong with prioritizing yourself and saying no from times to times. Happiness first comes with loving yourself and being happy with your inner and outer self. Taking “me” times are the ways to do it!

    Xo, Sitara | simplysitara

  • Lucy says:

    Yesss to this – I’m super busy at the moment, and actually theres times where I need to say no and just be selfish for once!

    Lucy | Forever September

  • Annabel says:

    I found last year I came to this realisation, and I have been SO much more happy for it. Admittedly I lost a few relationships, but then I guess they were never ‘proper’ in the first place if they can’t handle being rocked. Your own health, especially mental, should always come first. Great post!

    Annabel ♥

    Mascara & Maltesers

  • Adele Miner says:

    Ah I love this, so glad you shared it! x

  • Fay C says:

    This post – OMG I LOVE it!!! I have spent the past three months looking after everyone else. We have had a really bad time and I have been the strong one. I haven’t broken yet but you know when you can feel it coming, well I can and I know now that it is time for me to look after me. So once again this post I LOVE IT! Go you! x

  • Aimee Julia says:

    I think the word ‘selfish’ has such negative connotations that people are reluctant to use it. But, as you’ve wonderfully pointed out, being selfish isn’t about not sharing, or taking something for yourself. It’s about putting yourself first, and focusing on yourself. And that’s a really important thing! Great post. x x

  • Emma Hart says:

    Yep, sometimes you do have to be selfish and that TOTALLY OKAY. It is your life and if to get shit done you need to put yourself first, then being selfish is the way to go. I hope everything goes well with your essay, presentations and everything else that comes with studying at uni, I know what a stressful, crazy time it can be!

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