30 Thoughts We All Have While Trying To Get To Sleep

It will come of not surprise to you that I am writing this at 01:36 on a Sunday night/Monday morning.

I’ve technically been trying to get to sleep for about an hour and a half now. Nothing seems to be happening and I’m just getting stressed. Great times.

So, in the spirit of sharing, here are 30 things you definitely think about before bed.

1.  Errrmaggurrrd it’s already midnight why has this happened AGAIN?
2.  Tomorrow night I’m getting an early night, I swear
3.  Why is my pillow so comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time
4.  Ooooo what shall I have for breakfast in the morning?
5.  I think I fancy [x] but do I actually? He definitely likes me. I think. Do I even actually like him though? Maybe I just like him cause he likes me? Is that a thing? That’s definitely a thing.
6.  Omg remember that time I did that really embarrassing thing and RIP me
7.  I’m such an embarrassment why am I even here right now what is life
8.  Omg I could have pancakes yolo
9.  How many sleeps is it ’til Christmas/my birthday/a cool thing that’s happening?
10.  *Insert all the bad things I’ve ever done in my life here*
11.  Why am I not in prison?
12.  I should re-watch OITNB – I mean, it’s not like I’m sleeping. I could just start now…
13.  NO. I have to wake up at a reasonable time tomorrow so I am going to sleep goddamit.
14.  I miss the pet I had from like 15 years ago. Hug me plz.
15.  Am I hungry? Thirsty?
16.  Nope, need the loo. Uggghhhh, fine.
17.  Definitely going to do some exercise tomorrow…
18.  Why do I hate my blog so much ughhh but also I love it ughhhh
19.  I think I need a new [x] *opens up amazon app*
20.  Might as well recheck instagram/twitter/facebook/pinterest/yikyak/everything else
21.  Why has it only been 3 minutes since I last checked the time what is life
22.  Maybe if I try some of those breathing exercises all those pinterest posts say I should do?
23.  Nah m8 doesn’t work
24.  I could just pull an all nighter. I mean, it’ll make me more tired tomorrow night so then I’ll technically reset my body clock, right?
25.  But also [x] definitely does fancy me. Maybe I should text… no. stop. go to sleep now.
26.  What if the house caught fire like right now? What would I do? *Plans entire escape route out of window, including commando roll on grass*
27.  And another thing, girl I had a fight with three years ago, ….. Yeah! How do you like that!?
28.  Why do people always go all crazy for the ‘cold side of the pillow‘ like what even is that? oh my gosh yassss this is the best why do I not do this every night
29. Whyyyyyy am I still awake what is even happening to me right now?
30. What even is this unicorn phase everyone’s going through at the moment though? Seriously, am I missing something? (Seriously, am I?)

I could probably go on and on with this post. On and on and on. Sleeping can’t really be classed as one of my talents but hey, ho. That’s life, I guess!

Do you have anything to add to this list?
Should you be in prison?